Wondering

Have u ever feel thinking a person everyday, that u will regularly check his/her facebook/blog? I bet everyone will have this kind of feeling. When they didn't contact the person that really closed with them before but now they aren't.

I haven been contact or leaving any comments to her since last year. Kinda wanna know hows she going so i will look up to her blog. Anticipating her activity, how life going? is it well? Everything goes smoothly for her? or not?

I used to have heart to heart talk last year high school. But now, i make myself not to. Maybe because i know that every time I talk to her. She will be injured cause someone is controlling her action in many circumstances. Tracing her phone activity, stalking her everyday around her house. Or, I just very hate that my text every time i send to her have not been replied or i should say that they never been notified in my sent report.

I felt so disappointed when she switched her cell number without telling me. I got this news from other people. Sometimes i wonder if i WAS her friend? I don't dare to say I am her Best ones but I just want to be her very normal friend. A friend that can talk to when bored? A friend that I can hang out shopping, sing in karaoke.

Is that so hard?

I can't blame on her. Cause there was some times that i kept myself away from her for not wanting to get into any trouble. She asked for my help to break up with a crazy person. Although many advices was given, she ended up together again. So tired of giving same advices, tired of scaring the person will trace her when she was shopping with me, tired of hearing ridiculous stuff from that person. Suicide? standing middle of road? bang head on wall? cut her arm with my friend name?

Does it sounded ridiculous?

Life is hard without being determine. Any thing can make you vacillate without it.





Regards,

Leng.