Menstrual pain.
Gosh. The cruelest method.
Today, I had that in college. I can only describe the feeling, your inner organs are pulling each other or I should say like some force is making you unable to move, the only thing you can do is keeping a shrimp position to feel better. Is like, Complicated. PLEASE APPRECIATE WIVES.
I told that to a friend of mine, he just give me a cold.. smirk..
Mental will! My husband is always supporting <3 br="br" nbsp="nbsp">I had my lunch alone because I need to get my brunch fast to relief my pain. I took myself to the nearest food place after class, the first destination --- Paparich in college area. When I reached there.. there are A LOT of people lining to order food. SO, I move myself to outside the college area, the road became very hard for me to cross as I do not really have the energy to move fast due to the pain. Then, I managed to get myself to the food place~ Had lunch ( Fish ball mee + Hot Milo ) The walking journey took part again. Another hard journey back to college. Still in pain.
Until I slept for about 2 hours during my Business Law Lecture. Then, I have reborn! :D
Flashingbackpainess,
Leng
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Saturday, October 13, 2012
It's raining
Recently, I am all alone while going back home after finished my classes. Sigh. The time is not suitable for me to go back home cause nobody can pick me up at station if I arrived there before the time. So, all I can do is to stay back in college library to study a bit.
These few days been raining heavily at my areas and my college area too! One day, like usual I stay back then, I take out my umbrella to walk under the rain, when I under my umbrella or up? How should I say it? My mom fixed my umbrella and I felt touched. A little warm in my heart.
These few days been raining heavily at my areas and my college area too! One day, like usual I stay back then, I take out my umbrella to walk under the rain, when I under my umbrella or up? How should I say it? My mom fixed my umbrella and I felt touched. A little warm in my heart.
I saw a lot of couples walking romantically under the rain and I was like AWWWW. Although my love is quite far away from me physically, you are staying within me. Saw a quite pity couple, why do I said so? Still felt quite romantic but the guy.. Since both of them do not have an umbrella, the guy use his file to cover his girl, he is all in wet. Luckily is only some drizzle.
What else should I write? Ah yes! FINALLY YOU AND ME IS GOING PUBLIC!
That is all I can think of,
Well.
Leng
Love you more, day by day. *Heart*
What else should I write? Ah yes! FINALLY YOU AND ME IS GOING PUBLIC!
That is all I can think of,
Well.
Leng
Love you more, day by day. *Heart*
Monday, August 27, 2012
Air
When I breath in, I can smell the smoke from my father's cigarette, quite hard to breath. I do not really feel like breathing sometimes, because of that smell. All I can do is only close all the doors and windows, is a relief that he does not smoke in the house but when he smokes the smell will still enter the house from outside through the wind.
I miss the smell of the wind before, seriously. Me and my mother took some effort to stop my father from smoking but he just take them like kidding. Same as what my mother say " He is hopeless already " Perhaps the sentence is does not mean exactly like what I translated, I think the meaning is more or less like that.
Imagine how my lungs will be..
He has never stop this habit. He started smoking when he is 10. However, a miracle has happen for a period, he eventually stop this habit, we are really glad for that time. He even make fun of his friends that are smoking, we are really really happy for that. Until he went to work outstation, his old habit had return to him.. Total disappointed..
He says, people who does not have any bad habit ( smoking and drinking ) will pass away earlier than people that have bad habit.
Bullshit. Total Bullshit..
His explanation for proving that he takes back his old habit.
I miss the smell of the wind before, seriously. Me and my mother took some effort to stop my father from smoking but he just take them like kidding. Same as what my mother say " He is hopeless already " Perhaps the sentence is does not mean exactly like what I translated, I think the meaning is more or less like that.
Imagine how my lungs will be..
He has never stop this habit. He started smoking when he is 10. However, a miracle has happen for a period, he eventually stop this habit, we are really glad for that time. He even make fun of his friends that are smoking, we are really really happy for that. Until he went to work outstation, his old habit had return to him.. Total disappointed..
He says, people who does not have any bad habit ( smoking and drinking ) will pass away earlier than people that have bad habit.
Bullshit. Total Bullshit..
His explanation for proving that he takes back his old habit.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger
Hmm.. Just read my buddy's blog and decided to draw on mine as well.
She just turned into 19 few days ago. Haha. From the day she started to blog I been reading all of the notes she posted. Slowly realised that, she is turning more mature and had gone through tough times. Glad that she is still the optimum girl that I used to know :) But... Some of her part is still the same. Haha.
She blogged almost everything as in, why she will feel happy out of sudden, why she will feel sad, what she wanted to achieve and what changes her perspective on things. And, compare to what I blogged, I am only writing negative stuff. :( Because I am very tired of being happy for the whole day in front of people? Or this is the real me, always being negative. When people around got turned down by obstacles, I will always be the one that cheer them up. However, I can not cheer up myself, I think is because not convincing enough? Is not like I do not want to share out the problem to people around me, is just that I fear I might be crying when I am telling out. :(
Today, I tried to tell Wei Nie that I am the kind of person that will not have long lasting friendship because when our surrounding factors changed (Eg. Classes) I will have no topic to talk with my previous best friend. Even we are very close to each other during this year. Hehe. I nearly cry out.
Then, when she tell me back how she can still able to manage her friendship with her friends, I feel very envy of them, to be honest. I am always the leader in the friendship group cause as always I am the one that ''hunting'' for friends at first. However, I do not have the ability to take the role of managing friendship. Maybe, I am born to be the ''hunter'' but not the manager :)
Very often, I am very afraid of myself, for being so inability in managing friendship. How will I survive in the society if I do not have friends that I trusted and is fixed around me? I do not know. Hoping to have changes in the future or relying on how Wei Nie will save me from there.
Wei Nie, at first I really do not like her, because she is too annoying and noisy sometimes. Then, from time to time, I become very adore of her talent in talking ( or to be more specific, kept on repeating what she telling to others ) Haha. You see, my little group have 6 persons,when we found out something interesting but some of them are not around she will kept on repeating diligently to others but her eyes were on mine like I am the one that doesn't know about it. Haha. Quite annoying for the beginning.
However, Haha, kinda interesting when she was doing that, I can participate by giving different facial expression at there, like for the first time she tell the joke to 2 of the members, I will Laugh-Out-Loud. Then, for the persons afterwards, I will not laugh but will act serious when she is trying to share the joke to others and this sometimes will add up the humour. Haha. Seriously!
Another thing that I do not like about her is always being ignore by her when I am trying to talk my opinion :( Things changed, after I had told her that I always got ignored by her, now turn into when I or any one of us wanna talk but we sounded at the same time, SOMETIMES, she will let us talk then only she take her turn. Haha. Still this situation is quite rare, Haha. Allowing us to talk before she finished her's. Never mind, we had already immune to that already especially myself. :D
I kinda like this girl as a friend, a very annoying, childish but at the same time mature when dealing with serious things, very yong shui. Hahaha. She will not have chance to read about this~
Leason : Annoying level upgraded, Hoping of changes.
Regards,
Leng
She just turned into 19 few days ago. Haha. From the day she started to blog I been reading all of the notes she posted. Slowly realised that, she is turning more mature and had gone through tough times. Glad that she is still the optimum girl that I used to know :) But... Some of her part is still the same. Haha.
She blogged almost everything as in, why she will feel happy out of sudden, why she will feel sad, what she wanted to achieve and what changes her perspective on things. And, compare to what I blogged, I am only writing negative stuff. :( Because I am very tired of being happy for the whole day in front of people? Or this is the real me, always being negative. When people around got turned down by obstacles, I will always be the one that cheer them up. However, I can not cheer up myself, I think is because not convincing enough? Is not like I do not want to share out the problem to people around me, is just that I fear I might be crying when I am telling out. :(
Today, I tried to tell Wei Nie that I am the kind of person that will not have long lasting friendship because when our surrounding factors changed (Eg. Classes) I will have no topic to talk with my previous best friend. Even we are very close to each other during this year. Hehe. I nearly cry out.
Then, when she tell me back how she can still able to manage her friendship with her friends, I feel very envy of them, to be honest. I am always the leader in the friendship group cause as always I am the one that ''hunting'' for friends at first. However, I do not have the ability to take the role of managing friendship. Maybe, I am born to be the ''hunter'' but not the manager :)
Very often, I am very afraid of myself, for being so inability in managing friendship. How will I survive in the society if I do not have friends that I trusted and is fixed around me? I do not know. Hoping to have changes in the future or relying on how Wei Nie will save me from there.
Wei Nie, at first I really do not like her, because she is too annoying and noisy sometimes. Then, from time to time, I become very adore of her talent in talking ( or to be more specific, kept on repeating what she telling to others ) Haha. You see, my little group have 6 persons,when we found out something interesting but some of them are not around she will kept on repeating diligently to others but her eyes were on mine like I am the one that doesn't know about it. Haha. Quite annoying for the beginning.
However, Haha, kinda interesting when she was doing that, I can participate by giving different facial expression at there, like for the first time she tell the joke to 2 of the members, I will Laugh-Out-Loud. Then, for the persons afterwards, I will not laugh but will act serious when she is trying to share the joke to others and this sometimes will add up the humour. Haha. Seriously!
Another thing that I do not like about her is always being ignore by her when I am trying to talk my opinion :( Things changed, after I had told her that I always got ignored by her, now turn into when I or any one of us wanna talk but we sounded at the same time, SOMETIMES, she will let us talk then only she take her turn. Haha. Still this situation is quite rare, Haha. Allowing us to talk before she finished her's. Never mind, we had already immune to that already especially myself. :D
I kinda like this girl as a friend, a very annoying, childish but at the same time mature when dealing with serious things, very yong shui. Hahaha. She will not have chance to read about this~
Leason : Annoying level upgraded, Hoping of changes.
Regards,
Leng
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Here comes the once a month
I realised my posts are very regular. HAHA. Once a month.
So, this is the ending of June, week 9 of my college semester. Nothing special has happen as how much I can flash back from previous.
Is like, this few months ended in the blink of eyes.
Really, weird. What I do everyday is only sleep and sleep and SLEEP all over again. I do not understand how I did that, I am too tired struggle in college? Assignment? Tests? Sometimes even friendship is also one of the factors of exhausted. The only thing that can still can maintain my mental health is my husband :P.
I am in the middle of doing assignment and now i am typing on my blog. What nonsense right? I discover a new friendship. Although I do not really like her all the time but i am still sticking around with her.
That was what i typed last week i could not continue to finish that post because that time quite lots of people i know was around. I want to make my blog be secret~ Only certain people like you guys know about it. Keke~ <3
Know the reason i wanna kept this in secret? Cause I can type my gossips and complaint at here without caught by them. *Evil* True. I must learn to be good in managing my impression in front of some people, what not to show, what can be show.
Gossip renew
Nowadays the gossips are surrounding only that ONE. The one that i dislike at the beginning then, opinion changed to not bad then until recently turn into VERY BAD. Not very bad but just BAD. At the beginning, I do not really like the attitude of her, or i mean all the new members of friends that i discovered during the first semester of college. I GOT IGNORED QUITE FREQUENTLY BY THEM. Now, this thing does not matter already cause I already learnt to treat them back with the way they treat me *HOHO* But, i can not stand myself for doing that so frequent. SO. You know the result, I failed half succeed half.
Girls friendship can gain and loss very easily, unlike guys. Back to the ONE, when you are useful to them, you are friends, but when you are having some problems you know what will happen. After all, I can not put the blame on her cause they have the ability to make the choice. I do not know how I deal with that so easily when that incident happen and I am the one that advising others do not mind about her choice. And, now i am the one that still very concern about her, as in treating her differently i mean in not really friendly like old days. I do not treat the person good when I am very clear that HE/SHE will not help me when i am facing difficulties.
Story : The story is like this, Peg as the leader of this semester, borrowed a book for assignment purpose and she had lost the book. We attempted to find back the book, but failed, already asked around like people and school departments even cleaners. Then, fine, we took the book as already lost and can not be found. Here comes the thing, that book, was not used by some of the members (including her) and some like me only flipped through for once. Peg approached library to ask about the penalty and was informed the penalty will be charge DOUBLE which is about RM 150. Then, the boy friend of Peg, helped with RM50 and we as group members (excluding her) offered our help. After that, we discussed how much we should contribute each of us and HAHA she say : " Huh? Why me? I did not even touched the book." This is so touching right? My another friend Ann, also did not touched the book and she also willing to pay for it. For me is like a responsibility of a group member as we also wrong for did not look after that book properly.
Morale of the story : Do not expect all of your friend will help. Realised that we are only the college-class-homework-assignment group members. HAHA.
Now the scratch on friendship is getting worse. How long we will stay as one? -_-
For me, the thing is should not be a BIG ISSUE. Still, why i am so concern about THAT?! Okay. Stop. This issue happen few months ago, YOU SHOULD LET GO. Why you so weird? Starting, alright, I respect your choice; later, this is not okay, you selfish D*ck!!
I am the combination of a arrow and a shield.
Really, weird. What I do everyday is only sleep and sleep and SLEEP all over again. I do not understand how I did that, I am too tired struggle in college? Assignment? Tests? Sometimes even friendship is also one of the factors of exhausted. The only thing that can still can maintain my mental health is my husband :P.
I am in the middle of doing assignment and now i am typing on my blog. What nonsense right? I discover a new friendship. Although I do not really like her all the time but i am still sticking around with her.
That was what i typed last week i could not continue to finish that post because that time quite lots of people i know was around. I want to make my blog be secret~ Only certain people like you guys know about it. Keke~ <3
Know the reason i wanna kept this in secret? Cause I can type my gossips and complaint at here without caught by them. *Evil* True. I must learn to be good in managing my impression in front of some people, what not to show, what can be show.
Gossip renew
Nowadays the gossips are surrounding only that ONE. The one that i dislike at the beginning then, opinion changed to not bad then until recently turn into VERY BAD. Not very bad but just BAD. At the beginning, I do not really like the attitude of her, or i mean all the new members of friends that i discovered during the first semester of college. I GOT IGNORED QUITE FREQUENTLY BY THEM. Now, this thing does not matter already cause I already learnt to treat them back with the way they treat me *HOHO* But, i can not stand myself for doing that so frequent. SO. You know the result, I failed half succeed half.
Girls friendship can gain and loss very easily, unlike guys. Back to the ONE, when you are useful to them, you are friends, but when you are having some problems you know what will happen. After all, I can not put the blame on her cause they have the ability to make the choice. I do not know how I deal with that so easily when that incident happen and I am the one that advising others do not mind about her choice. And, now i am the one that still very concern about her, as in treating her differently i mean in not really friendly like old days. I do not treat the person good when I am very clear that HE/SHE will not help me when i am facing difficulties.
Story : The story is like this, Peg as the leader of this semester, borrowed a book for assignment purpose and she had lost the book. We attempted to find back the book, but failed, already asked around like people and school departments even cleaners. Then, fine, we took the book as already lost and can not be found. Here comes the thing, that book, was not used by some of the members (including her) and some like me only flipped through for once. Peg approached library to ask about the penalty and was informed the penalty will be charge DOUBLE which is about RM 150. Then, the boy friend of Peg, helped with RM50 and we as group members (excluding her) offered our help. After that, we discussed how much we should contribute each of us and HAHA she say : " Huh? Why me? I did not even touched the book." This is so touching right? My another friend Ann, also did not touched the book and she also willing to pay for it. For me is like a responsibility of a group member as we also wrong for did not look after that book properly.
Morale of the story : Do not expect all of your friend will help. Realised that we are only the college-class-homework-assignment group members. HAHA.
Now the scratch on friendship is getting worse. How long we will stay as one? -_-
For me, the thing is should not be a BIG ISSUE. Still, why i am so concern about THAT?! Okay. Stop. This issue happen few months ago, YOU SHOULD LET GO. Why you so weird? Starting, alright, I respect your choice; later, this is not okay, you selfish D*ck!!
I am the combination of a arrow and a shield.
Friday, May 25, 2012
Everything
SHIT. I accidentally deleted my posts this year. HAHAHAHA. Bagus.
Is alright. I will just write somethings to replace back them.
So, as I started my second year of diploma in accounting course I am highly motivated to study cause this is where seniors started to struggle. I stay back on my own to study alone in library for few weeks and sometimes those times I spent there paid off but some did not because I am too tired. I need to get up early 3 times a week as my travelling distance to my college was quite far. You see, I need to start my journey 1 hour before my classes start, I am grateful that I have a very kind friend that willing to fetch us to college everyday morning. I appreciate very much!
Then, my body condition working under pressure of studies. My hormone becomes irregular and causes delay in my period. Anxious. Maybe I am not made to work under pressure. A very interesting fact from my friend, Good academic result, relationships and sufficient sleep. Which two will you choose? I picked good result and sufficient sleep but I will lose relationships (friendships&romance) is true enough that you would really love to keep all of them in the same time. You will not have sufficient time to maintain these elements. Therefore, is like you need to give up somethings behind things you picked. However, it does not mean that I will give up relationships as I have a gang of friend that have assemble aim in studies and a very understanding fiance of mine. I rather lose some things that I picked, as in attempting to balance all of them. A balance in all is better than losing one of them.
My dearest, I have not love him less but more everyday as I live and breathing in the earth. He is always been a very good listener to problems that I faced. What should we do with the disagreement of dating during studies from my dad? Our answer, patient will solve everything in the future. He is one of my fixed assets other than my parents in the upcoming years. I mean Yeah. If the world does not ended in this year, I shall be Mrs. and he shall be my Mr. that share the same surname.
Regards,
Leng.
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